Happy Friday everyone! Today, I’m talking about a subject that I don’t talk about often, but I have mentioned before on my blog, and that’s religion. I’ve made posts like God Do You Hear Me and Falling Back Into Faith. This isn’t a religion series, but when I look at it, it’s almost turned into an accidental series of its own. In my first post, I discuss feeling like I’ve strayed away a bit from my religion. In my second post, I discuss wanting to become the person I once was and getting back into my faith. This post is kind of like me stating where I am and steps I’ve recently started to make. I highly suggest checking out these posts in order, so before reading this post, go look at the other two and then come back!
In this post, I simply want to answer three questions: What has been going on, What change(s) have currently been made, and where do I want to be in the end?
What has been going on?
So, my journey hasn’t been too much of a journey meaning, when I last wrote about wanting to fall back into faith, no steps were really taken to get there. As I’m talking about this, I urge all the Bible thumpers to PLEASE exit this post. I don’t have the time to be criticized…thanks. Continuing on, I treated this journey like I treat a lot of things I say I want to do. Though my heart was in it, I procrastinated, fell off, and went about my regular daily life. As time has gone on, I would at least go to church every Saturday (I’m a Seventh-Day Adventist, which shortly put, means church for me is on Saturday), but I’ve even stopped going as often as I used to. Granted, it’s not the act of going, but the church itself that just puts me off, but that’s a different matter. What has been going on? Pretty much no progress to sum it up.
What changes have currently been made?
We are in present day, and actually, it is exactly one year later from when I wrote my Falling Back Into Faith post. How crazy is that!? Unfortunately, a year later no changes have been made…until a couple of months ago. I have not made any changes as far as how often I go to church, I’m still terrible with praying daily unless it’s before I drive, and I have not made many steps. I’ve been transparent on this blog from the moment I’ve started and that will remain. I haven’t been doing the basic steps, but I’ll pray if I need something, whether that’s for me or for someone else and I think that’s common. We don’t want to take even the basic steps to get closer to God, but when our family member is sick or we need a sign for our path, we’re jumping to our knees. I’m not exception, but I did finally start taking little steps.
A few months ago, I invested in a Bible. I finally decided to purchase my own Bible, and with me being extra, I couldn’t just get ANY Bible. I HAD to get a rose gold Bible that I found on Amazon. Don’t think my purchase was just for a superficial aesthetic purpose, because it wasn’t. There are also many different bible studies and parts to the Bible that I loved as well. If you want to see what it looks like, I took a picture on my Instagram(@theblackprincessdiaries). With that, I also purchased a journal to write in. Having both of these, my goal was to do Bible studies every day. One feature that the Bible has is a plan for each Book where the chapters are separated for each day of each week. You can even check off when you’ve read the chapter(s) for that day and it’s related passages. I thought that was so cool, and with that, I started my Bible study journey.
Like most journeys, it hasn’t been linear. I’ve gone a month or more where I didn’t read my Bible, but then I’d jump back into it, and repeat. I can say that I’m trying my best. For the past month or two, I’ve been doing my studies consistently. I have finished one book, and I’m almost done with another. I’m hoping that it stays like this and I end up taking more steps, because I do know it takes more than just doing daily Bible studies.
Where do I want to be in the end?
I’m never going to be a super mega christian…I already know that. There’s nothing wrong if you are one, but there’s nothing wrong with not being one. Everyone is different and worships God differently. For example, sermons just don’t do it for me. I’ve maybe had two or three pastors or speakers that were able to draw me in with their sermon. I worship better through music. Music is my sermon. With that being said, I do want to be at a place where I’m paying more attention to the sermons and even writing down points, instead of being clocked out on my phone because I’m not feeling it. I also want to be better with my praying and Bible reading. I want to faithfully read my Bible and pray daily as much as I faithfully make my cup of coffee. I want to be back into going to church every Saturday(I can’t promise I’ll be on time, but I’m not perfect). Lastly, I want to overall be the christian I’m meant to be. Not every christian is the same and if you judge someone for not being like you, then this is your sign to stop. I don’t want to be the type of christian my grandparents think I should be, I don’t want to be what I think I’m supposed to be, but what I’m MEANT to be. That’s so important and I’ll keep working and battling until I get there.
Are you religious? Have you been on your own journey? l’d love to chat, so don’t be afraid to talk about it in the comments!
I love how open and honest you have been in this post my lovely. Although I was brought up a Catholic and went to a very Catholic strict school ran by nuns, I decided to change my religion and become a Wiccan as bing a Catholic never felt right for me. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and views and I’m wishing you well in your religion journey. I’m sending you so much love. Stay strong, stay home, stay safe. ♡
With love, Alisha Valerie x | http://www.alishavalerie.com
Oh wow, how was it switching from being Catholic to becoming a Wiccan? And Thank you so much! I try my best to be as open and honest as possible so others can know they’re not alone. Stay safe also. Sending back my love ♥
Thank you being so transparent in your journey. I am a Christian. I’m non-denominational despite attending AME and Baptist churches from 4 to 16. I’ve been on my journey with God for awhile now. Initially, I wished for the version I thought I was supposed to be. If you watch Greenleaf, Sophia’s character is the epitome of the “ideal young woman of faith who prays and reads her Bible everyday” and leads the children’s ministry at her grandfather’s church. However, I’ve accepted that’s not me. I do pray and read a daily scripture via YouVersion Bible app. They’ll send you a Verse of the Day if you enable the app notification. I haven’t been to church in a year. However, my relationship with God has improved because the relationship with myself has improved in recent years. I wish you the best in your journey. Don’t beat yourself up. Worship comes in many forms. And if part of your purpose is this blog, I’m sure God is pleased.
“My relationship with God has improved because the relationship with myself has improved” WOW I need to write that down somewhere because that is honestly something I needed to hear! Thank you so much for that. I appreciate it so much! I pray this is my purpose and that I’m pleasing him the best way I can. Thank you so much for reading and commenting ♥
Sissss… I appreciate you for this transparency in your journey!!! Not to be boastful about it but I too struggle with reading the Word most times, however I am active and serve in church. Once before I was famous for getting on my knees when I need guidance or a family or friend need prays but never daily and to simply thank Him. Lately, I’ve been reading random scriptures and Bible plans on YouVersion. Nobody’s journey is perfect; we all have missed church, stopped praying, stop reading the Word at least couple in our lives… fact that you aren’t giving up on your journey is what pleases Him most! Stay encouraged sis!
Thank you love! I just try to be as transparent on here as much as possible. You’re not the only one to bring up YouVersion. I have the app, and I remember saving so many Bible studies I wanted to do, but I never actually went through them except maybe one. I still ignore the reminders I had set, but I want that to change as well. That’s so true. No human is just born the perfect Christian. I’m going to keep going and keep pushing on this journey! Thanks for reading and commenting sis! ♥
Honestly, I am right there with you and also wrote about it a long time ago. I set out to find a church a year or so ago and am nowhere. I was born and raised a catholic girl but stopped going to church because I didn’t care for a certain priest and didn’t believe in a lot of what they were saying. I have a daughter who is gay and they don’t ‘accept’ her. I don’t believe God judges anyone. So I have been to another church more non-denominational, but Christian, and it’s a bit much for me. I want to find a church for when I really need to go, but in the meanwhile, I just want to be a good person and act according to what I believe God would want. I do a lot of praying on my own. At this point, I don’t know if there is a church that encompasses what I believe about God. That’s my ramble and I know I am not alone!
You are definitely not alone! A lot of Christians are in church and think that because they attend every week sitting in the front row and they usher or play in the band or whatever, that they’re good. But outside of the church, they’re so rude to people and don’t show any form of Godliness whatsoever. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian. God isn’t going to be like “You flicked off your neighbor, but you were in the front row at church so you can get into heaven” That’s not how it works. So, don’t worry about not having a church right now. Just keep doing what you’re doing and when you find your church family, you’ll know. It’ll just feel right ♥
That is what I believe! Best wishes on your journey! xo
Same to you love ♥