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Let’s Talk: Stop Holding Your Tongue To Please Others

Growing up, I’ve always been someone who didn’t really say much to others or speak my mind about things that I wasn’t okay with. If I had to guess, I would say that it stems primarily from being the shy kid who was bullied and also feeling as if I didn’t have too much of an option when it comes to speaking my voice on things. Some of you may have gone through the same things if you went through the whole “children should be seen and not heard” thing as a child. Now that I’m older, I’ve really appreciated being able to find my voice and telling it like it is.

I still have some work to do, but I love the freedom of finally having that voice and not just letting things slip by. Thinking about this, I know that I’m not the only one who has experienced holding their tongue for others and is still battling with holding their tongue. Again, as someone who’s pretty quiet and has felt like my voice was never able to be heard often, I get being used to staying quiet.

It’s time to open your mouth.

Life is too short to not speak how you feel just to please others or just because it may seem like the easier route. Not speaking up potentially sends the message to the other person/people that what’s going on is okay when you know and feel it isn’t. This goes for these strangers on the internet, your friends, your boss, coworkers, and especially your family members. Some people are afraid of hurting the feelings of others so they hold their tongue. The only message that sends is that your feelings don’t matter at all when they do matter.

Holding your tongue can also cause a lot of build up of emotion. I know this a little too well because I’ve experienced it multiple times when growing up. I’ve kept my mouth shut and that allowed my emotions to build up to a point where I could’ve explode. That’s not what you want to happen because then it could take the situation to a different direction. The point is to make yourself heard and get your point across…not get into a yelling match or end up wanting to shut down altogether.

It’s time to stop pleasing others. It does nothing for you or anybody else in the long run. We’re in a time where people love to get real vocal, share a lot of wrong opinions, and get away with as much as they can if you let them. Don’t let them.

I’m not going to say “stop holding your tongue all 2021”.


Stop holding your tongue PERIOD and find that voice!


  1. I’d like to think that I’m a straight-shooter, but sometimes I have to ask myself: “Am I going to say this because it’s honest feedback, or am I trying to be mean?” Also, if something is a sensitive issues, I struggle to find the right words and end up offending the person. I still have so much to learn.

    • I understand what you mean. When it comes to sensitive issues, you definitely have to be careful depending on the topic and sometimes it does come to the point of deciding when it is the right time to say what you have to say, but it is still important that you say it. Don’t worry, I still have learning to do as well. I don’t think you ever stop learning and growing with these kinds of things.

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