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Diary Entry #34: A Rough Time

Dear diary,

I need a redo…stat! This month has absolutely not been it for me. It’s not the entire month, but a majority, especially the last three weeks. I’m not sure what has been going on, but I just have not been on my game at all. To put it plain and simple…I am having a ROUGH time (emphasis on rough).

I say this all of the time that social media is just a fictional story. You see so many people on there smiling and everything, but you never know the story behind the photo. With that being said, that obviously doesn’t mean that everyone who posts on social media is actually suffering, but it also means not to assume. I’m sure no one can tell that I’ve been struggling or have been going to bed at 3 AM every night for three weeks just by looking at my social media, but it’s true. I’m just hoping for a better month next month. I need a complete reversal of whatever this month was. Like I said earlier, this month wasn’t a TOTAL mess, because I did have something exciting happen and I’m also excited for that to come out next month as well.

I believe that two things are being taught here…first, that there’s always some kind of silver lining through the pain. It may not become visible just yet and you might have to wait until the smoke clears, but it’s there. Even if it’s not there, there’s always something to learn or to realize. Second, it’s okay to be okay and to admit that you’re not okay. There is just way too many things going on for people to not admit that they’re not okay. So many people are afraid to admit that they just don’t it together. It’s okay to say you don’t…I certainly don’t! I just hope that as time goes on, more people will feel less afraid to be open about what’s really going on. Then, we all can bond together collectively and support each other because at the end of the day, someone may feel alone but they aren’t and there’s someone in this world who knows their pain and their struggle.

Comments

  1. I read this last night and I wanted to comment but I was exhausted. I’m certain May will be your month and more great things will crop up and surprise you. Too many people are taught to put a brave face on and mask true emotions so when I started unravelling it was always, wrong time/wrong place/wrong audience! I hope at least venting helped to release your tension πŸ™‚

    • I hope you were able to get some rest! I hate that it’s so normal to hide your emotions, and what you said is proof that it’s not a good idea to do so because it can cause you to explode at the wrong people. It’s definitely helpful to have that release and to know that I’m also not alone with this month being an off one. Thank you for always reading and commenting β™₯

      • I love your content so it’s natural for me now that I no longer feel self conscious about commenting. I did get a good sleep thanks, so much so I slept through two alarms. Fashionably late as usual πŸ˜€ You’re definitely not alone. Today was a good day but that’s a rarity for me.

        • Omg that means a lot to me to hear that! I’m so happy that you love my posts and feel comfortable enough to comment on them β™₯. I wish I had a good sleep like that lol. I’m hoping next month I can get some better sleep so fingers crossed! I hate to hear that it’s rare to have a good day, but I’m glad today was good for you! Hoping for more good days ahead β™₯

  2. You’re so right. Everyone’s dealing with something – especially during this time. I think the first thing is admitting to yourself, “I’m not ok or I’m alright not great but alright.” Have you seen people be honest with each other about that on social media?

    • There are some people who I’ve gotten close to that might say that to me if we’re talking, but I don’t see it that often on social media. It’s so sad.

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